Im Not OK today.

No intro. Totally i felt so down today. Feeling Sad, Crying alone. Only god knows..I dont like this feeling...the mood doesnt help me today. Im totally dull, deep in my heart...its really really paintful. Why it always happen to me.

When she Gone

She's gone
Somewhere far from us...

some could please help to tell me, whos son is this? Time ni dia dh penat sngat...penat sbb tunggu akak nk departure. Ni kiran dia dah boring gillerr.

All because of that person

Did i realize that im this bad...i always want to change...but i've less spirit...too easy to be influenced.......d same bad as yesterday...wish i could be a better person...not to satisfy others,but be myself......i just dont want to be like this forever..hhuuuhhh...enough about that. It wont help me rite now.

so now...all i can say...i much prefer living by myself...lot of things i would lose by getting into a relation...it cost too much... too much burden.

Guess what...

been a year,i was living in questions......i kept asking myself,maybe,i'd done something that not ok. no matter how hard i pushed my brain to think and think about that and yet still i could not find d answer...as there was no answer...i didn't do anything...but now,i know d truth...its hurt,yeah its really hurt...forgetting all those memories and having no more weird feeling towards ....i wish that everyone would choose to be outspoken,honest with ur feeling and keep no secret..holding someone in question is very cruel..it torture d person's feeling badly,truth is really hurt but pain will stands for only a moment but after 1 or 2 days,u will feel no more sadness...u may also forget the problems...but if u hold someone in question,not telling d truth,u r torturing she/he mentally...unless u reveal d truth,d person won't feel better,won't forget d problems and d best of it,he/she will suffering and living in pain for a long time until u tell he/she d truth...believe my words,its hurt...

btw should i ask him again? hhuhhhh...i will hurt me again...

Takder Tajuk kot..

Sleepy, Tired, Exhausted...

That the words that can describe how I am right now. There are so much things to do in so little of time. I'm so sleepy as the last couple of days,! Even during sleep! Those deep thought during sleep hours, really make me worried and make my mind and body tired and exhausted. Complete whole set that can lead to maximum stress and depression! Fuh!Not's only that, I had make punishments to myself for not able to satisfy myself and disappointing somewone. Someone? it's not my mistake la. But i think she hurt me. By using her laser toung although at first started with a normal conversation. But because of she is older than me, i have to "sabar" and not to reply watever she said. Do she think that she is perfect? It ok let her be wateva she want to be. But for my part, mybe i need to squeeze away myself so that i wont hurt again with her laser tounge. Ooouusschhh...i should watch my words too.

Weekend always be my non-working days. I have to find out myself this weekend, will I be able to work instead of leisure? Hehehe. Gosh...I have already plan to bake cake this weekend.

So..that part of my life that have a little bit of disappointing. But I do have to be really optimistic and positive. Life never perfect. And though I am not perfect...I always think that I deserve to be the best! So..I have to do the best to become the best!. Yeah..semangat!!!.Then..come the kenangan. Errmm...I guess 'kenangan' always become our best dreams.

Let share this kenangan which i snap using my lovely sony ericsson.

Nama anak da'ee bju merah ni Faiqah. Dia pun suka dh bergaya sakan skrg. Ni bagus ni. nnti mama Danish dapat baby tkyah beli stroller lagi dah. Share jer. Tp yg kesiannye, pagi raya ke 5 kot...tngok2 tayar stroller danish dah patah satu. Anakku punye brand ni mmg tak tahan la. Takpe pasni soh beli Maclaren lak hehhehheTengok la Nur Auni yg debab ni. Ni time kitaorg bergotong royong buat sate. Penat gak la. Ni pakwe mane ek? Ustaz mana ni? Hehheheh ni baju Adam maktok beli kt Mekah.

Hari Raya

Sajer nk share citer sikit. Tahun ni mostly semua balik raya kat umah mak. Cumer bezanya raya ke2 baru smua 11 anak balik and + satu family anak angkat mak dari Serawak datng beraya bersama. Hari rya pertama dh smpai dlm kul 1pm. Terharu gak sebab dorang satu family dlm 7 orang dtg beraya dgn maktok kedah. Big amount of money ha...jauh lak tu. Suka sngat dorang.
So hari rayer ke2, baru acik and andak balik. So pperrrhh...riuh rendah. Anak 11, menantu (tolak ler saye) and cucu. rasanya cucu dlm 20ek? ntah taksure...luper nk kira. Tapi kalau cucu lebih 20 org...maktok bagi sorang 50...uisshhhh..bayak nyeee....uuhuuhuhu tk penah pun dapat mcm tu time kecik2 dulu...unless kena g beraya sampai 50 buah umah baru leh dapat kot...tu pun kalau tk penat. Berungtung budak2 skrg.

Raya ke2, bakar sate. And mak ada buat kenduri sikit. Riuuh sungguh time tu.

Tapi dalam keseronokan tu...ada jugak la yg terkecil dan terbesar hati. Biasa la adik beradik...

Sajer je edit gambor2 ni. Ni ari raya ke2.

Ni kiranya anak2 buah yg bawah2 skit la....mcm team B la. Tapi adam katne ek time ni....ooo patut la Adam tkderr, Adam rayer umah tok perak pagi tu...

Ni time citer citer pagi raya gak lerr..seronok anak2 buah, maktok bagi sorang 50..jeles nih.

Berposing kat laman umah jerrr tpi beriya sungguh

Ni kiranya photo session la.... tp tk smua pun bergambar...sibuk pagi2 raya

Ni pulak family andak...ada org baru tu tahun ni , Qaisarah

Ni da gals yg glamer...ashik berposing jer

Tepi laut

Nur Shafiqah And Nurul. Both enjoyed taking photos. Tapi panggil dia adik. Dia mmg suka begambar. Thats why camera dia special. Canggih dari org lain.

Second Half Family

My 2nd half family. Klau balik umah family ni, i become as along. hhmmmm tp tak mcm perangai along pun.

Ni umah kat SPU bkan kat shah alam. Best gak compare dari umah shah alam. Besar and luas.